The writing (and other things) on the wall

Anon

No COLAS Christmas Social  would be complete without the  light-hearted lecture from Roy  Walker showing some aspect of  London's history. Last December  we were presented with a lesson  in the use of English, the dangers  of buying presents in the wrong  shop and just how many oddities exist on the walls around us. Audience participation was encouraged.

The talk started with a look at some remnants of walls, which we were asked to identify.  I was certainly surprised that a section of the Huggin Hill Bath-house survives in a car park but recognised the rubble that is all that remains of the Blackfriars Monastery.  This section concluded with a fragment of the outer wall of the Queen's Hall in Portland Place, which had been destroyed in the Second World War.

Next came the writing and some lessons from the book Eats, Leaves and Shoots. "What is special about the word unique?”  we were asked.  "It cannot be qualified!" we replied and were shown a property developer’s sign reading  “one of the most unique..." A double qualification.  The importance of punctuation    the apostrophe in particular, was emphasised with the restaurant   sign from Holborn - PU'S THAI BRASSERIE.  Just imagined the drop in trade if that apostrophe wasn’t there.

Roy explained the importance of names in signs.  They tell a little of the history of the building or organisation.  This was illustrated with Mary Sumner House in Westminster.   Mary Sumner founded the Mothers’ Union and the building bearing her name was the MU's gift shop. A cautionary tale was told of the COLAS member who mistook it for an Anne   Summers shop with disastrous consequences when he tried to do his Christmas shopping there.

We moved on to the much awaited oddities section and started with memorials. Dame Mary Page has a large tomb in Bunhill Fields, a plaque on which tells the story of her demise - in 67 months she was tapped 66   times 240 gallons of water drawn without ever repining at her case or ever fearing the operation. 

The Royal Artillery Memorial at Hyde Park Corner quite clearly states that "FORTY NINE THOUSAND, AND SEVENTY SIX" gunners died in World War I.  However, closer inspection shows that it says "SEVENY" with no T but a cross bar on the last upright of the N.  The Panyer Boy plaque in Paternoster Square has letters seemingly added after the engraver had finished as though they had been missed.      

We were shown examples of important signs which had survived, notably Air Raid Shelter signs of World War II in Lord North Street, former home of Mary Wilson (Harold's wife), and John Anderson, the politician who introduced the Anderson Shelter to us during the Blitz.

As a tour guide, Roy said that any signs which gave information were greatly appreciated and showed the original street sign for Barton Street dated 1723.  He showed a similar sign for James Street dated 1673, asking if anyone knew where James Street was. Even when he told us, we couldn't place it. A trick question

- James Street had been renamed Orange Street!

Cowley Street, Westminster, is the headquarters of the Liberal Party which  occupies  an interesting building of the very early 1900s. A closer look at the shield above the number of the building disclosed a fading monogram of the  railway company who previously had operated from the building – the Lancashire and Yorkshire Railway which merged with the London and North Western Railway in 1922.  A piece of hidden history high on the wall.

We finished the lecture with a question and answer session. The head of a bishop followed by a bishop's mitre. Where were they? The first was on the corner of Ironmonger Lane and Poultry, the birthplace of Thomas a Beckett. The second signified the site of Bishopsgate and was on the wall close to Camomile Street.  We were shown the famous mice and cheese sculpture from Philpott Lane but were slightly stumped when asked where the image of a wren could be found. This was on the wall of the Bank of England Registry in New Change, off Cheapside.   Fortunately, PT was not stumped when asked what the smallest British birds were.  The firecrest and goldcrest are actually smaller than the wren which had been chosen as the emblem on the smallest British coin, the farthing, in 1937.

Another question followed. The former home of film producer Michael Balcon in Westminster had a small niche on the wall with a sill supported by a figure.   A figure of what? The few guesses were incorrect.  It was not an angel nor fairy doing the job, but a bat using his wings.  Another oddity was the cement emblem used to brighten up the exterior of the foreboding electrical sub- station in Archway Road. Not a flower, not even a coat of arms but a generator!

We finished the talk considering the demise of a substance which  once was essential to the tannins  industries of London and which was collected from the streets by  collectors of pure". "Pure" is now just a nuisance being the rather quaint name for dog poo   So, asked Roy, what do we do now if we have need of it?  All was well, as his final slide showed, he had actually, found a shop in Finsbury Park which traded in the substance - a shop called "Pure"